What Real Couples Argue About During Pregnancy

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Image adapted via Flickr/ Emery Co Photo

Relationships are hard work and if you've been in a long term one, you'll know that even the strongest partnerships have troubling times. Some years are the best and others you find challenging as you communicate through issues and struggles.

For me, times of change and seasons of new things tend to put added pressure on my marriage. We've been through a lot together in the past 15 years and pregnancy and new babies have been times were we've had to buckle down and get through it together.

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During pregnancy, you're going through a lot of physical changes and as the woman, your body is the one doing so much work. With such a big change on the horizon, issues and concerns can bubble up in a relationship and become a talking (or arguing) point in your partnership.

I asked several women and an expert about arguments arose during pregnancy – so we can all see that we're not alone and this season can be hard for all.

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Image via Flickr/ Emery Co Photo

Parenting Styles

“With us, the big debate was always about parenting styles. He's very American and I was born and raised in India. I was happy to defer to childhood rituals and concoctions that I had learned from my mother and he was more adamant about reading up on the latest scientific research on everything! In the end, it's about finding a compromise and balance.” — Kaamna Bhojwani-Dhawan, Founder + CEO Momaboard.com

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Image via Flickr/ EmilyGrace Photography

Diet and Nutrition

“Pregnancy was a really great time for my husband and I, but the one point of contention we kept butting heads on was what I should eat while pregnant. I'm a vegetarian and he's not, but with plenty of support from my doctor and as the CEO of Peas of Mind, a healthy kid's food company, I won that argument.” — Jill Litwin, Founder/CEO Peas of Mind

{ MORE: Black Mothers in America Are Dying and We Need To Talk About It }

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Image via Flickr/ Emery Co Photo

Communication is Key

“In my opinion, men and women worry about different things while expecting a child, but don't often communicate those worries with each other or argue about them. Men are more likely to worry about finances, their autonomy and their sex life while women worry about changes in their relationship, their work status and any changes associated with that and their bodies. It is after baby comes that couples are blindsided by the intensity of the transition. Disagreements are many and include role and identity changes, division of labor around the house and how to prioritize time and money. This is a time of scarcity and couples end up scorekeeping while they scratch and claw for the limited resources.” — Hilary Silver, LCSW, Relationship Expert, Owner | Silver Therapy & Coaching 

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What did you and your partner fight about during pregnancy? Share in the comments.

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What Real Couples Argue About During Pregnancy

Devan McGuinness is the founder of the online resource Unspoken Grief, which is dedicated to breaking the silence of perinatal grief for those directly and indirectly affected by miscarriage, stillbirth and neonatal death. Using her own experience of surviving 12 miscarriages, Devan has been actively supporting and encouraging others who are wading through the challenges associated with perinatal and neonatal loss. Winner of the 2012 Bloganthropy Award and named one of Babble's “25 bloggers wh ... More

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3 comments

  1. Toshi89 says:

    Personally, I find the title ignorant and realize that some people could be insulted by the fact that it insinuats that if you don’t argue about these things you aren’t a “real”couple

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