I Did Not Have a Natural Birth, and I’m Perfectly OK With That

If I had to sum up my birth experience in three words, I would say brutal, traumatic, and bloody.

Basically, the last three words anyone would want to use to sum up any experience at basically any point in their lifetime. Ever. Especially when it comes to welcoming a squeaky new human into your life.

I have detailed my birth experience many times (you can read about it here: DudeMom's Birth Story), so I won't go into it again here. But I am going to talk about natural birth and how I didn't have one and am totally fine with that despite what Judgy McJudgerson at the park had to say about it. (Something to the effect of “I bet you wish you'd had a natural birth, probably everything would've been different ya know? Oh well, hindsight! LOL.”)

5 Reasons I'm Perfectly OK With My Non-Natural Birth Experience, and You Should Be, Too.

Natural birth is not a badge of honor. You're not going to have a better baby, or be a better mother, or even a better human for choosing a natural birth.

It is a choice — like breastfeeding and cloth diapering and co-sleeping and all of those other parenting choices you will have to make while other people judge you. It has no bearing on how well you will parent or how much you love your baby. Probably it's more about sanity and not ripping your husband's head right off of his neck because HE DID THIS!

What's right for me is really only right for me. Allowing other people to influence your mommy-ing decisions based on their own personal preferences and value judgments is a great way to have a really long, lonely stint in motherhood land.

There will always be someone who thinks their way is the best way. (They will basically 99% of the time be entirely wrong about this.) Because when it comes right down to it, as long as you are giving your children protection, affection, connection, and direction, you are probably doing the best thing.

The medications aren't going to destroy your baby. Of course, there are potential side effects — that is the case with any medication. But there are side effects to also not accepting pain medicine during labor once you reach the point where you feel like you NEED it. (See previous note about your husband and his head). 

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My birth was abnormally painful. And without my epidural, the pain would've been even more unbearable. As it was, I passed out from it.

It felt natural to ME. And by natural I mean right — and for sure less invasive than the two c-sections I had following it. But even those experiences are not ones I am unhappy with or ashamed of. I did what I thought was best for myself and to ensure the healthy birth of all three of my boys. To me, that's natural. 

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