10 Parents Share the Funniest Thing Their Child Has Said About Breastfeeding

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Image adapted via Flickr/ Lars Plougmann

When I was a child, I remember turning to my mom at the grocery store and asking her a question about the wind. I think I was about 4 years old at the time, and I had asked her if the reason the trees blow (in the wind) is that they're all laughing at a funny joke. I had heard my mom tell this story to me as I got older, and when I had kids of my own, they started asking fun, inquisitive questions of their own.

My kids ask questions all the time, and to me, it's really interesting to see how their mind works as they get older and try to make sense of the world around them. Sometimes, their questions are serious and must be answered with gentle care, and other times their statements and questions are just so funny I can't even deal.

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When kids encounter things they've not seen before, like new babies and all the things that come along with that, their minds work on overdrive. With this big change comes new questions and statements out of their minds, and when it comes to breastfeeding, their stories, questions, and observations can sometimes be really, really funny.

My kids have said some great things about breastfeeding, breast milk, and babies in general. I reached out to some fellow parents to see what the funniest things their kids have said about breastfeeding, and the stories do not disappoint!

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Image via Flickr/ Mothering Touch

Balloons and Dry Wells

1. “Jake just did this this morning while I was feeding the baby. He poked me and asked ‘balloon?'” – Chaunie, Tiny Blue Lines

2. “My then-3-year-old son once lifted his shirt and graciously asked, ‘Who wants a drink?' I didn't have the heart to tell him that, ahem, his wells were dry.” – Alice, Mildly Inappropriate Mommy

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Image via Flickr/ Mothering Touch

Juice and Dinner

3. “I caught my 2-year-old daughter with her shirt lifted trying to breastfeed her baby brother. When I asked what she was doing, she said, ‘I give Miki (her baby brother) boob boob juice, OK.'” – Kelly

4. “This was not one of my kids but from a friend's child. Their 3-year-old boy was watching his baby sister breastfeed when he asked, ‘Mom, why is Hannah eating you?'” – Timothy, GunnPsych

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Image via Flickr/ various brennemans

Armpits and My Turn

5. “When my oldest daughter, Maysie, was 3 years old (now 6) and my wife was breastfeeding our 1-year-old, Maysie asked what the baby was doing. My wife, Brenda, replied, ‘She's drinking milk,' to which Maysie got a strange look on her face and looked at my wife in disbelief and exclaimed, ‘From your armpit?' When Alyce got older and my wife was feeding our youngest, Alyce asked, ‘Are you giving her milk?' My wife replied, ‘Yes.' Alyce pointed at each of her breasts and said ‘Oh, this one has milk and this one has chocolate milk.'” – Timothy, husband to Brenda of Living Phit

6. “My daughter nursed until she was 3. When she was almost 3, she wanted to nurse while we were in the grocery store. I told her this wasn't the time. She said, ‘Mom, I am going to give you three reasons why I should nurse. #1 I feel like it. #2 I am thirsty. #3 I love you and want to be with you.' We waited until we got home.” – Silvana, Silvana Clark

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Image via Flickr/ moppet65535

Past Property and Sharing is Caring

7. “When my son was about 4, we visited a friend who was nursing her child. Seeing this, my son came over to me and started to unbutton my blouse. Wanting to explain to him that it wasn't OK to do that and trying to make my point, I gently removed his hand and said, ‘Sweetie, my body and my breasts belong to ME.' Looking at the nursing baby and then back to me, he sadly replied,'Yeah, but they used to belong to ME.' ” – told by friend, Miriam Losupovici, to Allen Klein, author of Mom's the Word: The Wit, Wisdom, and Wonder of Motherhood

8. “I was breastfeeding my 2-month-old son on the sofa while my daughter, who is 2 1/2, was playing near me with a dog finger puppet. Next thing I know, she walks up to me and says, ‘Mommy, the doggy is hungry. He have mommy milk from your nipple, too?' I didn't have the heart to say no since she's finally accepted that I won't stop nursing her little brother just because she wants me to. And she really asked so nicely, so I ended up tandem “feeding” a baby and a finger puppet for a few minutes. Not my proudest moment, but my daughter was happy!” – Melanie, President and CEO of Udderly Hot Mama

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Image via Flickr/ Daddy-David

Boo-Rahs and Mustard

9. “I breastfed my son until he was about 18 months. When he wanted to nurse, he'd say, ‘Boo-rahs, Mama? Boo-rahs?' We have no idea why he called it that, but he did. When he was 1,we moved to central Mexico for the year, and we lived outside a very rural and agricultural town called Tizapan el Alto in Jalisco (it's south of Guadalajara). We befriended a wonderful family, and they were pretty surprised that I was still breastfeeding my son. Breastfeeding after six months or so is pretty rare there. The funny part of the story is that they thought ‘boo-rahs' was some kind of American slang for nursing, so they all called it ‘boo-rahs,' too. I didn't realize this was going on until I was talking with one of their cousins who had just had a baby, and she was talking to me in English. She asked about ‘boo-rahs' and how long my son breastfed, and that's when I realized we'd had a misunderstanding about ‘boo-rahs.' ” – Amy, BirdsAndBeesAndKids.com

My favorite story: I know that kids say crazy things, and so it's no surprise I've heard some good ones from my own kids. Here's my favorite memory so far:

I nursed my third child until just before her third birthday, and when I was pregnant with my now youngest, we talked a lot about breast milk and what it is. We talked about how it's used to feed human babies just like cow milk is for cow babies, and so it's an open discussion here. One day, while I was feeding my now-youngest baby, my third child turned to me and asked, “Mom, is your mommy milk made up of blood and mustard?” Clearly, I didn't explain what breast milk is well enough.

{ MORE: How Much Breast Milk Does Your Baby Drink? }

Do you have any funny breastfeeding stories?

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10 Parents Share the Funniest Thing Their Child Has Said About Breastfeeding

Devan McGuinness is the founder of the online resource Unspoken Grief, which is dedicated to breaking the silence of perinatal grief for those directly and indirectly affected by miscarriage, stillbirth and neonatal death. Using her own experience of surviving 12 miscarriages, Devan has been actively supporting and encouraging others who are wading through the challenges associated with perinatal and neonatal loss. Winner of the 2012 Bloganthropy Award and named one of Babble's “25 bloggers wh ... More

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2 comments

  1. We are currently trying to have another baby and we have a six and a three year old already and we got to talking about breast feeding and how I did with my six year old but not my three year old and my three year old says yeah right there’s not milk in your boob! Squirt some out and show me! I said maybe once we have a baby we can do that haha!! And now every time he tells someone we’re trying to have a baby he never fails to add that I will then show him how to squirt milk out my boob!! OMG! Lol

  2. Becky says:

    While I was still breast feeding my youngest, I was heading out to choir practice. My husband told the older boys that he was going to feed their sister a snack then it was time for bed. He meant he was going to give her some cereal, but the youngest of the boys piped up, “You can’t feed her, you don’t have boobs!” 🙂

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