Should Your Partner Come to Prenatal Appointments?

happy pregnant couple

Attending some prenatal visits is one way for your partner to feel as if they are contributing, and a way for them to feel connected with the baby.

Should your partner come to prenatal appointments? It's up to you, but my recommendation is yes. And no.

I think it's important for you and your partner to experience the prenatal appointments together. Many times, fathers don't feel as though they are included in the pregnancy. And while they aren't, physically, there are things you can do to make them feel part of the team. Attending some prenatal visits is one way for your partner to feel as if they are contributing, and a way for them to feel connected with the baby.

However, you're going to have about twelve to fifteen prenatal appointments during your pregnancy. That's a lot of waiting room visits, old magazines, blood pressure pumps, and urine samples. If that's too much– if your partner can't get off work that often or if you feel that it's not necessary to both be there at each appointment– then list all the prenatal visit appointments with your care provider and determine which appointments are the most crucial.

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For example, your 37th week appointment will probably be just a urine sample, weight, and blood pressure. And at your 37th week, this is old hat. But other appointments are much more interesting: your first appointment, where you'll be discussing prenatal care and determining the due date, your ultrasound, the appointments where you may be testing for abnormalities, and an appointment when you'll be discussing the birth plan. Talk to your partner about which appointments are essential and which are… well, boring.

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If your partner doesn't come to all of your appointments, be sure to keep a journal. You don't have to write an essay or anything– just jot down some notes from the appointment and if anything interesting happened. That way, you don't have to worry about remembering something important, and you also have some great info for your baby album.

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What do you think?

Should Your Partner Come to Prenatal Appointments?

Tell us what you think!

52 comments

  1. Anna says:

    Maybe it just hasn’t sunk in yet… I’ve told him when the last 3 appointments have been and he knows where but he hasn’t come or asked to ride with yet. My Doc. Says sometimes it just takes longer for men to get it. I hope he wakes up soon ‘cuz the next appointment is when we will find out the sex of the baby. We both want a boy!!! 🙂

  2. Charon says:

    I think that if he is able to make it to every single appointment then great, if not then the most important appointments are the ones he should worry about.

  3. kimberly says:

    i try to schedule every appointment because my husband insists on being there for every single one……it was a shame when they had to do the pap test i couldn’t make the appointment late enough for him to be there tho 😉

  4. Alanna says:

    My partner is involved with every aspect. We schedule the appointments on certain days to make sure he can be there.

  5. mommy nhoj says:

    He went in most of my prenatal appointments. He’s excused in those he missed ’cause he cannot not go to work.

  6. Krystal says:

    DUH! My partner wants to be involved with EVERYTHING! It may have to with the fact that he watched another male’s first experience with pregnancy (which involved the woman excluding him from everything and pulling some very terrible and uncalled for things) cut him to the core. I honestly believe if he had it his way, he would be caring the baby instead of me.

  7. ruth flores says:

    es algo dificl pero el lo intenta me acompañara solo en las citas importantes

  8. Lisa says:

    My husband wants to be at the important appointments and I really don’t want him to be at the routine ones. He works weekdays, so I only want him to take off work for something significant.

  9. REKERIA says:

    I would love for him to come but he is always working.

  10. Phammom says:

    He came to all the 1st trimester ones and the ultra sounds. He will also come to one with me to meet the other doctor and when I have to do the sugar test.

  11. My husband couldn’t be there for all the appointments but my mother came with me to all of them..

  12. MrsPearson says:

    My husband work hours are super crazy but he ask me all the questions to ask then i come back to tell him

  13. KaelinRae says:

    My fiance has been to all of mine. It does make him feel included and when he feels included he is very happy.

  14. KEIYONDA says:

    MY HUSBAND WANTS TO GO. HE ASK AS MANY QUESTIONS AS I DO. IT MAKES HIM FEEL INCLUDED AND "IN THE KNOW".

  15. Marilyn says:

    My fiance goes to all of mine 🙂

  16. monette3 says:

    I love having my husband at my appointments!

  17. Zoaea says:

    My husband drives me to all my appointments, but if I was able to drive by myself I would still want him there. He always ends up asking more questions than me (though it’s usually things I already knew). He really loves when the Midwife does an ultrasound, seeing the baby move and kick can’t be captured in a printout! But, for those with different schedules, try to at least schedule the important appointments on his day off, its worth it.

  18. MamaCat says:

    My husband came for two visits with our first – heartbeat for the first time and (which we were actually too early for) and the ultrasound. This time around just the ultrasound which was how I like it. Makes the visits faster for me and he has more time to take when our daughter arrives.

  19. Catman says:

    My husband has always been there, don’t have to ask him.

  20. Tracy says:

    Mine will be at every visit! He says he doesnt wanna miss a thing. This is our first together, so far he has been at every visit and every ultrsound. He even voiced his concerns with the doctor, asked a bunch of questions, even did most of the talking when it came down to the ultrasounds. I love it. Since the pregnancy he has been so supportive and more sensitive of my needs, he has helped out so much around the house. He works nights, so this is why its possible for him to make these appointments.

  21. My husband will be making it to all of the prenatal visits…he is "overly" excited with this being our first child together 🙂

  22. verochka31 says:

    unfortunatelyy out low income doesn’t allow him the chance to miss work………..

  23. my husband has came to a lot of my doctor appointments. He has a weird schedule and can’t always make it. BUT he has never missed the sonograms of any of our children. He never cared what we were having but he truly enjoyed watching all three suck their thumbs and how they all resembled each other!!

  24. AmyC says:

    My husband only had to miss one of my appointments due to traffic. He was happy to get to be at all the rest. I was glad to have him there with me too 🙂

  25. Anber says:

    My husband always accompanies me to my appointments. He is the one who remembers the questions I wanted to ask the doctor. It is so good having him there with me showing concern for both the baby and I.

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