Keeping Positive After Another Negative
When you start trying to conceive, you are excited. You wait the first month and hope that your period is missing. Then you do the same with the second month. Eventually, the excitement starts to wane. Maybe you're worried that it won't happen. You're stressed. You're afraid something is wrong. But now is the time to keep it all in perspective.
It takes around six months for the average couple to conceive. About 85 percent of all women conceive within one year. Most experts say that women under 35 should wait until a year of trying until consulting a doctor about possible infertility. Women over 35 may want to consult a doctor after six months of trying, according to Dr. Michael Zinaman from Loyola University Medical Center.
In other words, you have good odds. But that doesn't necessarily make you feel better. Here are a couple things you can do to help you stay positive when faced with multiple negatives.
With your partner, make a list of Things To Do Before Having Children. Think about things you love or think you would love to do that would be difficult with a baby, like traveling, learning a new sport, finishing a home improvement project, taking a class or two, saving money for something big, etc. Post the list in plain view and actively make plans to complete your list.
Plan “Me Days” for when your period arrives or when you test negative. Take an entire day to yourself and just do things you love– no work, cleaning, paying bills, or anything productive. Read a book, get a massage or a facial, take a swim or a walk, take a long nap, and just do things you love and things that pamper you.
Plan a special date with your partner each month and celebrate your relationship. Take turns planning the date and be creative– do something you normally wouldn't. Plan a romantic picnic at the aquarium. Go to a wine or beer tasting. Make a gourmet dinner together.
It's sometimes stressful when you are trying to conceive, but allowing your stress to take over is counterproductive. Make an effort to relax, enjoy your life, and celebrate what you have. Good luck to you!