And the Worst Baby Names of the Year Are …

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Many parents stretch beyond the norm to provide their children with unique, personal monikers. Some parents do this by using atypical spelling, while others devise names that are imaginative and, up to that time, undiscovered.

Fun Fact: Sophia and Noah were the top baby names for 2013!

Every now and then, I’ll hear a newfangled baby name and wonder, why didn’t I think of that one? It’s brilliant! But more often than not, I think the parents are undeniably crazy.

Perhaps I’m being too harsh; but I’m not the only individual that’s voicing this opinion. After looking at the official U.S. Popular Names List, Nameberry has selected the top five WORST baby names of the year.  Try not judge – for every horrible, unlucky name listed below, there are at least five little babies who will have to answer to it for the rest of their lives.

Nameberry’s nominations for the Worst Boy Baby Names, along with my personal annotations (hopefully the karma god won’t make my daughter fall in love and marry a boy with the Worst Baby Name #5 because of this) are:

  1. Albino
    I want to say that this is ridiculous … but I can’t. Because I seriously considered naming my daughter Eboni. And although we are of the pale-folk lineage, I still thought it would be a beautiful name.
  2. Craven
    Craven what? Bullies are going to have a field day with this. 
  3. Furious
    It’s okay, little baby. I’d be furious too.
  4. Angeljesus
    Perhaps the parents couldn’t decide between Angel and Jesus, so they put the two together. Regardless, this name can too easily turn into a religiousdebate.
  5. Anass
    Anass’s mom and dad are anass for not thinking this one through.

{ MORE: EF Family: Our Names and Why Our Parents Chose Those Names }

Nameberry’s nominations for the Worst Girl Baby Names, again with my personal annotations, are:

  1. Trejure
    If society is okay with names like Charity, Honor, Hope, and Faith, why not accept the name Treasure Trejure? It’s the spelling, not the name, that's Hashtag Awful.
  2. Ransom
    I think I can stop my commentary here. Per the Standard Karmic Rulebook, I’ve pretty much asked for anass son-in-law at this point, so I’d better stop. Although, according to the article, it’s “actually a variant of a common Arabic name, Anas … something that means ‘friendliness,’” which is a fact I shall focus on.
  3. Gunner
  4. Icy
  5. Kouture

{ MORE: Naming Twins and Multiples: What To Do (and What Not to Do) }

At the end of the day, the responsibility and joy in selecting a baby’s name goes to the parents, and only the parents. It doesn't really matter what the rest of us think, as long as these families are happy. Right?

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Do you agree with this list? What’s the worst baby name you've heard of?

 

What do you think?

And the Worst Baby Names of the Year Are …

Kimberly Shannon is a wife, a mother, an editor, a writer ... She is always working to find the perfect balance¹! After Kimberly received her bachelor’s degree in Journalism, she worked on two master’s degree programs (Creative Writing, and Marriage and Family Therapy). At various times in her life she has signed up to study Naturopathy, only to back out at the last minute, and humored the idea of returning full-time to the world of dance. Kimberly has also started 10 different children ... More

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33 comments

  1. Michelle says:

    I used to work at a school. Here are the worst: Crucifix, One Love, True Love,. Also children born around Christmas named, Holly Noelle, Mary Christine

  2. Cynthia says:

    A woman SSI Oh! Look they named my daughter. In the hospital. My daughters roommate said The Dr’s named my daughter Female ———! So I think the worst name is female.

  3. Jennifer says:

    As a mom of 4, 1 being a 1 month old newborn, I have to say, you should really consider the feelings of the baby to be. Think about how you would feel having to grow up with that name, how kids would treat you in school. Also, think about how you would feel with that name for the rest of your life, meaning would it be good in childhood and adulthood? Not all names are. Trendy names aren’t always the best, because a short ways down the road it becomes, “Oh my, what was I thinking”, or the child is down right embarrassed. Honestly, I really do feel sorry for a lot of the celebrity kids.

  4. Lori says:

    My opinion is that mothers should be off any medication before signing the birth certificate. The parents should also go outside and yell the name for at least 5 minutes. If you dont like it then, fibd something else. Also kep in mind that KIDS ARE CRUEL. They WILL find a way to brutally crush your child with hateful names. If you can’t think of a way your chosen name will be used in a rude way, trust me, kids WILL

  5. Toby says:

    So my crazy parents named me Toby. REALLY? Did they want a dog before me but gave me the dog name? They got a dog after me and named her Bridget! Middle school was awful…imagine getting on the school bus everyday and hearing “Hey Kunte Kinte” and “Toby, be a good #$!&@#”. Now I’m in my fifties and people ask me “is that your real name?” “Why did they name you that?” and I love getting Dear “Mr” mail. THANKS MOM AND DAD!

  6. Cody says:

    I get people want to be creative with names and that’s great and I get when a name is cultural. If anything get creative with a middle name. There are some names that only sound cute when you are a baby. My hubby loves star Trek so we have James T Patrick.

  7. Kate says:

    and the worst i have EVER heard is without a doubt….huckleberry twain….swear to god. lordy what were these parents thinking?!? (or not…)

  8. tabatha says:

    I worked at a pediatrics offices there were a family of children and the names were tequila, tangueray, and alizay. There were many other names that stick out but also felt bad for a little boy name Nykurrious. It will be a challenge for kids to have someone take them serious when they are adults and have such silly names.

  9. Linda says:

    I wish parents would give a lot of thought to the name for their child. I worked at a hospital for several years and so many names were just horrible, (Altunia, Lafoosha, Latanga, Mustard) but one that struck me dumb and never left my memory was “Leukemia.” Really? Names that are bizarre don’t do a child any favors as that child ages and starts to make its way in the world. A ridiculous name can raise a big red flag on a job application. Maybe it shouldn’t, but it does.

  10. Jillian says:

    My aunt worked as a head secretary at an inner city high school and mentioned the occasional wack-job of a name… The one that sticks in my head all these years later is a girl by the name of ‘Cocainah’. YIKES:)

  11. Brooke says:

    All of the names listed sound so made up and fake. I’m calling BS lol. I personally know a Chitonya. Went to school with a boy named Phouc Vu. Had a friend who names her daughter Bayarea. Knew a Shaquida, LaCreasha, Guadeluparia, and really common Princess and her brother Jahaynus. People love it.

  12. Stephanie says:

    One of my friends named her daughter katana, and another named her son samurai… To me these are something you’d name a pet, not a child. I have another friend named Crystle, which is a normal name, but the spelling… I had to program it into my auto correct.

  13. Whitney says:

    My husband went to school with a girl named Shitonya. My mom had a friend named Female, pronounced fem-olly. Ick!

  14. Katelyn says:

    My neice went to school with two sisters named: Orangejello and Lemonjello. (The pronunciation was changed)

    My sister told me of a girl who was named La-a. (pronounced La”dash”a) This poor girl couldn’t fill out her name when taking her SAT’s due to lack of dashes as a spelling option.

    • Diane says:

      Your story is very interesting, but isn’t true, because there cannot be another set of siblings named Orangejello and Lemonjello, and I actually knew these two children, twins, and they were BOYS. I worked at a juvenile court in Richmond, VA in the mid-80’s, and they were both on probation and would come in with their mother to see their juvenile probation officer. They would be in their 40’s now.

      Also, the “Ladasha” story was all over the internet recently.

      • sarah says:

        Apparently you can’t underestimate the stupidity of some parents…I’m from Iowa and know a set of male twins named Orangejello and Lemonjello (or-on-jell-o and lem-on-jell-o). They’re both about 20 since they were born within weeks of a friend’s son who is that age.

      • Lori says:

        Im calling BS on the jello names too. It was a joke a long time ago.

  15. Savannah says:

    One of my favorite authors is named Ransom… But it’s a male author. Ransom is a great name for a boy, but I really can’t see it as a girl name. Both of my sons’ names are old Irish names, Caelen and Braeden. They’re different, but throwbacks. Caelen is a Gaelic derivative of Caleb, and Braeden is just a different spelling to match his brother.

    • Candace says:

      One of my sons is name Kaelen as well! I was so concerned that it was too unusual, but in his case the name picked him and suits him perfectly. (Also we came to it through Nicholas–Gaelic “Cailan”)

  16. Sarai says:

    I know a guy that named his son Zeroxin which sounds like some type of prescription drug to me

  17. Casey says:

    I know someone who named their son Merritt …like from Pokemon.

  18. Stephanie says:

    Espn – how does that even make since? How do you pronounce it except for spelling it out. Or Absity

  19. Jessica says:

    I know a couple who named their baby girls after guns. Remington and Winchester.

    • Katelyn says:

      I know someone whose last name is “Guns” (shortened from “Gunsawarden”)…It was entertaining listening to his list of crazy names to name his unborn daughter. I can only remember on tho… Katastrophic Guns. Awesome! LOL. 😛 I don’t know what he endend up naming her.

  20. jessica says:

    My daughters name is yuffie *youfe* its Greek for joy and happiness and I’ve been told it’s the worst name ever

    • Katelyn says:

      The people that told you that are ignorant. Nothing wrong with cultural names as long as they don’t sound too close to another word in a language you planing on speaking a lot….unless its an awesome word. 😉

  21. Dianah says:

    While at a family outing my husband and I heard these parents calling their daughter Nemesis. terrible name!

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