Why I Want To Try For Another Baby
In approximately 25 days (but who's counting, really?), my husband and I are embarking upon the first real vacation we have ever taken sans-children.
This trip is a family trip, courtesy of our in-laws, and we couldn't be more excited to be spending some time alone together as a couple. It's been a whirlwind of an adventure, these past six years, in which we have done all of our “growing up” as adults–simultaneously graduating college and having our first baby, getting real jobs and buying a house. And then adding another baby almost every two years to the day.
Right now, our kids are at the magical fun ages of 5, 3, and 1. Needless to say, while Christmas this year is going to be a blast, we are enjoying a little breather.
But I don't think we're done just yet.
It always fascinates me to hear other people who talk about knowing when their families are complete.
“Oh, we're done,” one nurse at the hospital where I work has said. My nosy side just wants to say, how do you really ever know?
Maybe it's just the fact that I started my journey into motherhood on a surprise mission, when those self-fulfilling two lines showed up during my senior year of college. Part of me, every month, still whispers a wondering, what if? never quite convinced that the element of surprise is such a bad thing when evidence certainly points to the contrary.
I just simply can't fathom being completely done, or even really making that declaration myself. How can I say that I will never hold a newborn against my chest in the first sweet days of motherhood? How can I safely say that my husband and I won't delight over each baby's steps, the wonderment never fading as our family grows?
It's hard, to say what is the “right” number of children for our family to have.
And deep down, I don't want to be done.
I catch myself wondering how we could rearrange sleeping arrangements to accommodate just one more. How our 7-seater Traverse will handle not just three, but four car seats. When, and if, I will finally lose the last of the baby weight from #3 before starting all over again.
And perhaps most on my mind is the joy that I know it would bring our entire family the next time. Not just a love expressed between my husband and I, but a new family member for big sisters, and a big brother to meet. Thinking of them embracing, loving, and learning to live and share among each other brings me a lot of joy.
Some might say four children is a “large” family or maybe even too many.
But for us?
It sounds just about right.
P.S.–And just to be clear, I am not pregnant that I know of at this moment. Mexico, here I come!
Will you have more children or are you done? How did you know this was the right decision for your family?