Tricking a Girlfriend into Having a Miscarriage? Why This Man is Guilty!

woman cryingOnce a woman is pregnant, does the unborn baby’s father have any rights? If so, to what extent?

These are the questions being debated now that John Andrew Welden, 28, is facing up to 15 years in prison after pleading guilty to tricking his pregnant girlfriend into taking labor-inducing medication, causing her to have a miscarriage.

Deciding to have a baby is a big decision; but what happens when you’re ready for the new addition and your partner isn’t?

Remee Lee, 26, thought she was taking amoxicillin for an infection; but the prescription was really Cytotec, “a drug used to force contractions.”

When Welden recoiled at the idea of becoming a father and suggested that Lee have an abortion, she disagreed and decided she was going to give birth to the unborn child and raise it alone. So Welden took matters into his own hands. He forged his father’s signature on a prescription, and then relabeled the pill bottle.

“After taking one tablet, Lee experienced severe pain and cramps. She was about six weeks pregnant at the time. She later miscarried at the hospital,” according to the article.

Welden is hoping his plea bargain of only 13 years and 8 months in prison will suffice; without this plea, he could have spent the remainder of his life behind bars. But, is this plea bargain harsh enough? At the age of 28, you know the difference between right and wrong. He clearly acted with the intent to end her pregnancy – and he succeeded. He took the choice directly out of Lee’s hands.

However, didn’t Lee take away his choice too?

And … I can’t help but to point this out: Didn't they both choose to have sex, risking the possibility of pregnancy? Even if they used a condom, or some other means of protection, most adults are well aware that abstinence is the only protection that has a success rate of 100%. They are old enough to understand the gamble.

Tricking a woman into having a miscarriage is never an option, in my opinion. I can’t imagine the betrayal this woman is currently feeling, just because a man she shared a very intimate part of herself with didn’t want to become a father. Do you agree?

How much choice does a man have, once the woman is pregnant? 

What do you think?

Tricking a Girlfriend into Having a Miscarriage? Why This Man is Guilty!

Kimberly Shannon is a wife, a mother, an editor, a writer ... She is always working to find the perfect balance¹! After Kimberly received her bachelor’s degree in Journalism, she worked on two master’s degree programs (Creative Writing, and Marriage and Family Therapy). At various times in her life she has signed up to study Naturopathy, only to back out at the last minute, and humored the idea of returning full-time to the world of dance. Kimberly has also started 10 different children ... More

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28 comments

  1. Profile photo of Erin Erin says:

    This particular story is unspeakably sick. That poor woman…I can’t even imagine. Not for one minute here am I playing devil’s advocate for the man…I agree that he should rot in jail. BUT…what if the tables were turned, and that the woman wanted to end the pregnancy but the man wanted to be a father to the baby? Ultimately, the decision lies 100% in the hands of the woman. These scenarios never end well. The moral of the story is to be careful when you have sex, and not have sex if you’re not prepared to deal with all possible consequences. I’m going to go hug my baby and my husband now, and be so thankful that our family was planned and made from love.

  2. Profile photo of mommy nhoj mommy nhoj says:

    The mother has decided to carry on with pregnancy and raise it alone. Her decision should have been respected by all means. Those things he did even if after prison would have a lifetime effect on the mother. A lost that will be remembered and lamented.

  3. Profile photo of BillyJoe BillyJoe says:

    He is guilty of forging a signature and lying to her about what he gave her, and I would say murder too, just like any woman who aborts a child.

  4. Profile photo of Wiley Wiley says:

    He is guilty of premeditated murder of the child as well as the trauma and suffering he caused the mother. I think he should rot in prison although my 1st preference for him is death.

  5. Profile photo of JaMeika JaMeika says:

    I think that if he didn’t want anything to do with the baby he should have just let her raise it on her own as was her plan. I think him giving her the meds was wrong but I don’t think she took the choice out of his hands and frankly I think its kind of sucky for the author of the article to suggest it.

  6. Profile photo of Erica Erica says:

    Although he didn’t want her to have the baby he should have made the choice of using protection and actually being careful when having sexual intercourse. If he can’t take the responsibility with what comes with having a baby than he should not be allowed to have children especially after this scandal he has committed.

  7. Profile photo of Sierra Sierra says:

    He is a murderer. That is not okay… he should be thrown in jail for life!

  8. Profile photo of anncrusch anncrusch says:

    What do you mean, took his choice away? What choice would that be? He already made his choices: He chose to risk fathering a child by having unprotected sex and he chose not to participate in raising the child as much as that choice is allowed by law. Done. By having unprotected sex, he knew there could be consequences. Choice made. Once that happens, you do not have the choice to undo that. She did not take any choices away from him. She chose to accept responsibility for her choices. He chose to break the law. Good grief.

  9. Profile photo of dvmsara dvmsara says:

    Umm, that’s not a miscarriage, it’s an abortion. Totally disgusting that a guy would actually do that to his girlfriend (and their unborn child)!

  10. Profile photo of Vanessa Vanessa says:

    Regardless, he ILLEGALLY forged a signature on a prescription, gave it to his gf/ex gf, and KILLED her child without her consent. It is murder. He is an adult and realizes what he did was wrong on all levels. He deserves more jail time.

  11. Profile photo of Lizzie Lizzie says:

    He should have used a condom, she should have been more careful. It’s stupid to think men are willing to be fathers against their wishes. Why would anyone want to have a child with someone who is so anti- baby etc.? This guy is doing more time that child rapists, go figure.

  12. Profile photo of Diana Diana says:

    The father has 50 percent of decided as is the mother because the baby came from the two of them, but that was just a horrible act to do that to her.

    • Profile photo of anncrusch anncrusch says:

      A man does not have 50 percent right to chose to end a pregnancy unless he himself is pregnant. His choices were to not have sex, to not have unprotected sex, to protect himself from becoming a biological father, to choose not to be involved in the child’s life other than whatever is required by law, and so on. He does not have the choice about what happens with her body no more than he had any say concerning her taking birth control or not. He made his choices. He knew the consequences. Nobody gets to tell a woman to have an abortion. Nobody. That is her choice, and only hers, because in the end, she is the one that lives with that.

  13. Profile photo of nichole nichole says:

    he had a right. a right to not have sex with her!! he chose to. he had a right to voice what he wanted when she told him she was pregnant with his child, and he used it. he had the right (tho not a good choice and ide never tell any guy to ever do, or tell them they did a good thing if they did do it), to walk away and dissapear and be just another dead beat dad. he chose NOT to do that. that was his choice.

    she had rights too, to not sleep with him, tho she did. to decide if she was going to continue on with the pregnancy or was going to terminate… she chose carry on with it, and she also made the choice to give the looser what he wanted, which was she would raise the child alone, without him. meaning he didnt have to be a dad, just a sperm doner (altho the state probably would have found him for child support). by him tricking her into taking that drug, he took away her right to choose to keep the child. she didnt ask him for it, she wasnt forcing him to be a dad to the kid. there fore, he took her right away! which is absolute crap! he should get the max in jail for this. he wasnt some scared kid who was told he was going to have a kid. he was well into being an adult (by age anyways since actions say otherwise), and KNEW what he was doing. he shouldnt get any leniency in this. personally i feel he assaulted her physically by giveing her a drug in disguise and causing her the physical pain and to go into labor, and emotionally/mentally because she had planned on having this child, she possibly had already felt it move, most likely already seen babys first pic on an ultrasound machine. and adding my feelings on abortion into it all, which im totally against unless its a health reason or quality of life reason, he refused a person the right to live, because it inconvenienced him. thats way beyond wrong, and while ide like to see his life terminated for that reason, you cant really charge him on that if its legal in that location to have abortion but, you can get him on everything else, and put his pathetic excuse away for ever!!!

    • Profile photo of Morgan Morgan says:

      I agree with you. He did make the choice NOT to be a dad. She chose to be a single mom. He was clearly in the wrong and should be punished to the full extent of the law. He committed murder.

  14. Profile photo of EbyMom EbyMom says:

    This man is as guilty as charged cos he took matters into his own hands by criminally deceiving his girlfriend. This is so wrong what if the girlfriend had died from complications after taking the drugs.. The man might be afraid that when the baby is born he will be forced to take part in his or her upbringing. But his actions are so so wrong. People that don’t want to raise a child should not be involved intimately. Abstinence is the only 100% sure way.

  15. Profile photo of Elfie Elfie says:

    I don’t think she took away his choice because she said she would raise the baby alone! I don’t believe in abortions but this is different be ause (as everyone’s said) it wasn’t his body. They both chose to have sex. His choice was defininatly NOT taken away from him!

  16. Profile photo of Grace Grace says:

    definitely what he did was wrong, yes i think the man should have some rights but so should the baby…

  17. Profile photo of Darya Darya says:

    What he did was beyond wrong. If she wanted to raise the baby alone, that was her choice to make, not his.

  18. Deception on the level that causes someone pain, harm, or otherwise negative results, is unethical. The idea that a woman has a right to chose what to do with her reproductive organs remains her choice as they are hers. Unfortunately for women who choose to terminate when their partner wants to parent, seems like a difficult one to tolerate; however, that is a separate issue from the fact that this man tricked and encouraged his girlfriend to miscarry…an extremely emotional act for any woman to have to go through. Until women have the right to mandate vasectomies, nobody other than the woman with a fetus in her uterus has the right to choose what to do with it.

    • Profile photo of Kim ShannonEditor Kim Shannon says:

      What a great point! I don’t think women – or ANYONE other than the man making the decision – will ever be able to mandate vasectomies, which not only takes a choice away from a woman on a totally different level, vasectomies often happen without the wife’s/girlfriend’s knowledge. Thanks for sharing your thoughts!

  19. Profile photo of Phammom Phammom says:

    Tricking her is wrong. A man can either choose to be there or not.

  20. Profile photo of Angela Angela says:

    I’m feeling a double standard here. Women get abortions without the consent of the father all the time. I personally know 3 different men whose girlfriends had gotten abortions when those men WANTED to be fathers and keep their babies. Not that I think what he did was right, but didn’t Welden basically do the same thing?

    • Profile photo of Kim ShannonEditor Kim Shannon says:

      He did, but he did so many illegal things in order to accomplish this. A woman getting an abortion is choosing to do something to her own body and the fetus within her own body. A man that forces a miscarriage by forging a prescription and then placing a false label on the pill bottle is taking things to an entirely different level. What if she had an even worse reaction to the pills and had died, or something? I agree that it’s wrong to abort a baby that the would-be father wants to raise. If someone – mother-to-be or father-to-be – wants the chance to raise the baby he/she created, even if it was accidental, they should totally have that opportunity (unless – IMO – it was from rape or incest, etc.)! Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts!

      • Profile photo of nichole nichole says:

        i feel that way too in reguards to men who are wanting to step up and care for the child, and the mother just says eff off and aborts it. i dont think thats right for her to do, except in rape, incest, quality of life, or life threatening circumstances, and that it robs the father of the child he is willing to care for. unfortunetly some women will do that tho, and its their decision in the end due to it being their body…. but sence someone did something to someone elses body, without their consent, its defiantly not right that he did this. not to mention all of the other laws that were broken to get that pill….

        • Profile photo of Morgan Morgan says:

          I will disagree on the abortion aspect. I agree a man should have a right not to have his child murdered. Because that is what it is no matter how many people want to call that baby a fetus in order to convince themselves it’s not a child they are murdering. And even if the woman is raped…..that is STILL a baby who doesn’t deserve to be murdered just because the man who fathered the child is a rapist. It is not the baby’s fault, so why should the baby be murdered to pay for the crime?

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