Stay-at-Home Moms: Should You Get a ‘Postnup’?

Image via iStock/zilli
Image via iStock/zilli

After childbirth, many women leave their well-paid, successful careers behind in order to stay at home with their children. And, why not? Their husbands’ jobs will adequately provide, financially speaking; so they gladly become primary caregivers, able to savor every momentous milestone.

At first, it may be difficult to believe that negotiating a postnup could actually make your marriage happier, but it’s true. – Jeff Landers

But what happens when the “D-word” takes place? These same stay-at-home moms, who have been home for many years, now have sizable gaps on their resumes and have to find employment. This will not be easy!

Financial whiz Jeff Landers, author of Divorce: Think Financially, Not Emotionally, says, “I have seen too many women get the short end of the stick. The husbands turn around and say, ‘Well, it’s not my fault. It was your choice. You wanted to have children. You wanted to stay home with them. You could have gone out and worked, and in the meanwhile I, the husband, was busting my rear end, and why are you entitled to any of this?’ Or they say, ‘Before you stayed home you were making $50,000 a year, so you can certainly go out and get a job for that amount, if not more.’”

To compensate for this, many wives are beginning to request postnuptial agreements to protect themselves, should their futures stumble upon divorce! According to this article, “51 percent of divorce attorneys cited a rise in postnuptial agreements during the past three years.”

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You know, creating a postnuptial agreement is not a bad idea (especially if you signed a prenuptial agreement before getting married!). In the event of a divorce, a postnup will clearly define “how you would be compensated for forfeiting your highest-earning years.” And it might make that gap in your resume a bit easier to manage.

For many marriages, money can be a major cause of tension. If you think you’ll want to establish a postnuptial agreement with your spouse, make sure you both are in a good mood and prepared for an intense discussion. “Thoughtfully consider important factors, such as the amount of salary you’re sacrificing and the value (in dollars and cents) of the childcare you’re providing.”

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It sounds like this agreement might ultimately strengthen your marriage! “It can blunt future disagreements and will form the basis for continued constructive dialogue about your family finances.” What do you think?  Do you agree?

Would you ask your spouse for a postnuptial agreement, or do you have one already?

What do you think?

Stay-at-Home Moms: Should You Get a ‘Postnup’?

Kimberly Shannon is a wife, a mother, an editor, a writer ... She is always working to find the perfect balance¹! After Kimberly received her bachelor’s degree in Journalism, she worked on two master’s degree programs (Creative Writing, and Marriage and Family Therapy). At various times in her life she has signed up to study Naturopathy, only to back out at the last minute, and humored the idea of returning full-time to the world of dance. Kimberly has also started 10 different children ... More

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1 comment

  1. mommy nhoj says:

    we didn’t have prenup agreement so I guess we are not doing the post one. I know my husband is a responsible father. I don’t want to entertain the thoughts about separation/ divorced. And focus our energy on raising a happy family. It may not be the ideal one but something for keeps!

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