Single Mom Friends: The 5 Friends Every Single Mom Needs in Her Life
It's been said that raising a child takes a village. But in today's fast-paced society that seems to require children to be in five different sports, two clubs, and AP classes at a minimum, it can be really hard to have the time to find your people. It may take some serious getting out of your comfort zone to find some single mom help. But making the effort to get these five single mom friends in your life can make a big difference in your outlook.
- The In-the-Trenches Friend
This is someone who has kids roughly the same ages as yours and is currently in the same parenting stage, whether that's changing a bajillion diapers a day or dealing with all the tween angst. This is the person who you can fire off a text to find out if her kid is also suddenly throwing super tantrums because he wants the other (identical) pair of green socks. She probably has some great sitter recommendations. And she understands that a playdate really means letting the children loose in the backyard while you sit on the porch talking about the latest episode of Game of Thrones.
- The No Judgement Friend
You'll recognize this mom because she probably swears a lot. Which is fine because it means she totally isn't going to judge you for dropping an F-bomb in front of your kid or feeding them nachos for dinner two days in a row. She's the one who reminds you that keeping your children alive, safe, and (fairly) clean is an accomplishment in and of itself. She's the one you want when you need someone else to tell you it's fine to let the dishes sit another night in favor of some self-care via binge-watching.
- The Online Friend
Yes, an in-person support system is crucial to staying sane. But a solid online-only friend can also be a huge plus to a single parent. This is because you don't have to deal with the pressure of being active in each other's lives. There are no phone calls to return or playdates to reciprocate. And you don't have to worry about running into her at the store when you're buying three boxes of donuts … The day after you swore you were finally going to eat less sugar.
- The Fun Friend
This person is probably childless and always up for a girls night out. She's the one who reminds you that being a mom doesn't have to mean going days without brushing your hair and that self-care is vital to your sanity. She may not always understand what true lack of sleep feels like or why you're so stressed about what preschool to choose. But she's got your back when it comes to getting out of your mom slump and dating advice.
- The Platonic Male Friend
Sure, a woman can do anything a man can do, and single mothers prove this every day. But there's also going to be some times when having a male friend is convenient. For me, these times have been when I haven't had time to mow the yard in two weeks and it now vaguely resembles the Amazon. Or when I want to go out for a night without getting hit on. Or when I really want to go to the tractor pull and don't want to have to walk the mile back to my car from the fairgrounds alone at night. Oh, and that time I bought a 300-pound treadmill that wouldn't fit in my Corolla. Yes, it can be tricky to keep things firmly in the friend zone. But if you're clear about what you're expecting and willing to give in this situation, it's well worth it.
When it comes to single mom help, who's at the top of your list? Are there any must-have single mom friends we missed?