Country Singer Jana Kramer Breaks the Silence on Her Miscarriage
Jana Kramer, a country singer and popular Instagram influencer is helping to break the silence on the grief of miscarriage.
In a powerful Instagram post, Kramer shared her experience miscarrying her second pregnancy. Next to a heartbreaking image of her ultrasound, Kramer shared her tears, her grief, and her plea to let others know that they are not alone in experiencing a miscarriage. The mom of a 22-month-old daughter wrote that this wasn't her first loss and she wanted other women to know that they had every right to grieve through their pain:
“Today I am 1-3. I debated posting this for the exact reason why it’s a silent struggle. I don’t want I’m sorry or sympathy. I just don’t want to feel alone. And I know I’m not. This unfortunately isn’t my first loss. When I first found out I was pregnant I wanted to shout it from the rooftop but I know for reasons like this we have to wait. So because we don’t tell many, we have to suffer silently…and suffering silently was my thing in the past, but it’s not now. For the women out there who have miscarried in the past and need support and a place to grieve their little one lost or to those in the thick of it like me who are currently grieving and in pain, let us all be there for each other. You don’t need to feel alone and maybe that’s me talking to myself but if you need a place to share, I’m here for you…and all of us are (and guys too. We sometimes silence your voice because you feel bad to express how it’s made u feel so let this be a safe place for you too). And because I don’t have all the words to say because I’m knee deep in crying and trying to listen to God, my girlfriend @alittlebitfancy says them for me. But in her Words and her story on her loss. It’s powerful and strong and those who have suffered a loss I truly feel u can heal reading her blog. I know for me it helped. Head over to her page. Her link is in the bio and also in my bio. I love you guys. #yourenotalone”
As a mom who has experienced two miscarriages in the past two years, I appreciate so much when other mothers are willing to talk about their own experiences and pain. I truly felt like I would never recover from my first loss and I remember questioning everything I was feeling and experiencing, wondering if it was “normal” or not.
Of course, there is no such thing as normal when it comes to miscarriage, but there is comfort in knowing that other women have gone before you. It comforted me somewhat to know just how much grief and pain an early loss caused in other women, too. I remember thinking that I was “overreacting” or that I didn't deserve to feel so sad. I remember wondering if I would ever be able to stop wearing sunglasses to school pick-up because the tears insisted on coming at all the most random moments.
When other women shared how they felt the same way–how they had struggled, how songs had triggered them, how they too hated looking at their now useless bottle of prenatal vitamins, how they had articles of clothing, household items, and more that they associated with their loss–I was able to have some peace knowing I was not abnormal. On top of losing a baby, so many women wonder if they are the first one to feel a certain way or beat themselves up for being so sad. Why do we do this to ourselves?? I'm honestly not sure, but I know now that the only “right” way to feel through a miscarriage is exactly how you feel–there is no right way and whatever you need to do to get through is what you should do.
No one going through a loss is ever truly alone and I can guarantee that other women have felt the same way–they might just not talk as openly about it. Which is why it's so important that women in the public eye help pave the way for all of us to realize that miscarriage is not something we need to be ashamed to talk about.