Is There a Right Age For Motherhood?
When I became a mother unexpectedly at the age of 21, I had my doubts if I was doing the right thing. Still a college senior taking my laundry home to my parents every weekend, I didn’t exactly have “responsible mother” written across my forehead.
As my husband and I struggled with finishing up school, moving, and settling into jobs as new parents with a squalling newborn, I often found myself plagued by insecurity.
Was I too young to do this? Do I know what I’m doing? Will my daughter realize one day that I was totally ad-libbing this whole parenting thing?
Turns out, I didn’t need to worry so much. Having kids early on may not be such a bad deal after all.
Some women, like Penelope Trunk, an author, blogger, and career advisor argue that the key to women “having it all” is popping the kids out early. In her post, “Get Pregnant at 25 if You Want a High-Powered Career,” Penelope suggests that it’s much easier for women to have the babies first, and then focus on building their careers. She cited 25 as the “ideal” age for women looking to have both babies and careers; so apparently, I’m way ahead of the game by starting at age 21!
And one fertility doctor I spoke to recommend that women who wish to have children do so in their early twenties to avoid the risk of a miscarriage. “With every passing year, the risk of miscarriage highly increases,” she related.
Every situation and every woman is different. But the important thing is that I have learned that there is no such thing as one “right” age or time for motherhood. Each season of life and each age for parenthood brings strengths and advantages—what’s important is embracing ourselves as mothers in every light.
Photo via J & J Brusie Photography