Judge Rules Women Can Kick Fathers Out of The Delivery Room

What would you think if I told you that a judge recently ruled that women can kick fathers out of the delivery room if they so choose?

And what would you say if I told you I agreed with her?

Earlier this month, a New Jersey judge released a first-of-its-kind opinion when he ruled that a woman had every right to deny the father of her baby entry into the delivery room.

{ MORE: 8 Things Not to Say to an Expectant Dad }

The couple in question had been engaged when she got pregnant, but then they later broke up. When she told him that she didn't want him present at the birth, he (reasonably?) sued for the right to be there. 

And the verdict?

Denied.

dads in delivery room
Image via j&j brusie photography

And although at first glance, the ruling may sound unfair—I mean, after all, isn't the baby as much his at it is hers?—I think it's a fair ruling and, honestly, something that more women should realize they have the right to do. 

I can't even name the number of births I have seen hindered – and maybe even harmed – by the presence of, at the very least, a hapless father, and at the worst, an abusive father. 

I've seen men belittle their partners during birth—men who joked with their friends and ordered a pizza to the delivery room while the mother labored on, trying hard not to make too much of a fuss through her increasingly painful contractions. In one horrible case, my fellow nurses even related the story of a father who had raped a new mother while she was still in the hospital. 

As much as I would like to imagine that every new mother comes into the labor and delivery ward with the accompaniment of a supportive partner, the fact of the matter is that, sadly, that's not always the case. 

And while there will be time—a lifetime of time, in fact—for a couple to work out parenting, or co-parenting, or heck, even determine custody at all, labor is not the time to hash out disagreements and argue over parental rights. 

{ MORE: As the Due Date Approaches, Panic Sets In }

Labor and delivery is the time, first and foremost, to ensure the health of mother and baby. Birth is serious business, and I've seen women who had severe complications because of undue stress during labor—complications like increased blood pressure, emergency c-sections, or unnecessary interventions that can't, of course, be directly linked to the presence of one person in the room, but yet are there.

It might sound crazy, and while I am in other ways a full supporter of paternal rights and getting the world to wake up and recognize that babies are a part of a man's world too, in this case, I have to say:

Mama knows best.

ADVERTISEMENT

What do you think? Should women have the right to keep their baby's fathers out of the delivery room? 

What do you think?

Judge Rules Women Can Kick Fathers Out of The Delivery Room

Chaunie Brusie is a writer, mom of four, and founder of The Stay Strong Mom, a community + gift box service for moms after loss. ... More

Tell us what you think!

4 comments

  1. Laura says:

    I completely agree. Its the woman, mom, going through labor. Its not the man’s/fathers place to say what goes. Its most important for the mother to be comfortable, cared for and soothed. For hundreds of yearsthey ddidn’t even allow men in the room so why is this an issue now!?!? The way I see it, is I’m doing it I get to decide. End of story.

  2. dvmsara says:

    Why is this considered crazy? I don’t know why this even had to be decided by a judge–it should be a given that a mother has a right to choose who is and is not in the delivery room. If she was in the hospital for any other reason, she’d certainly be able to choose who visits her; why would this be any different?

  3. Krystal says:

    I honestly believe that it depends on the circumstances of the two parents in question as every situation is different, if it is going to cause problems for the mother in labor, then she should have every right to kick a the father out, if she’s the problem and the father hasn’t done squat except want to be there for the child, then he should have every right to be in the room whether the mother wants him around or not. It just depends.

Advertisement
[x]
×

EverydayFamily.com Week-by-Week Newsletter

Receive weekly updates on your pregnancy or new baby’s development as well as Free Stuff, Special Offers, Product Samples, Coupons, Checklists and Tools you can use today, and more from EverydayFamily! Plus all new members are entered to win FREE diapers for a year! Receive weekly updates on your pregnancy or new baby’s development as well as Free Stuff, Special Offers, Product Samples, Coupons, Checklists and Tools you can use today, and more from EverydayFamily! Plus all new members are entered to win FREE diapers for a year!

Due Date or Baby's Birth Date


By clicking the "Join Now" button you are agreeing to the terms of use and privacy policy.

Send this to a friend