Jennifer Lopez on the Myth of the Perfect Family

jennifer lopez

Most of us have grown up envisioning the perfect family in our future; the house, the 2.5 kids and a happy father with a June Cleaver mother – but the truth is, that just isn’t the norm anymore.

Jennifer Lopez recently talked about the perfect family in conjunction with promoting her new show “The Fosters” a tale of a lesbian couple raising a family. She says, “You can't keep spoon-feeding the idea of what the perfect family is. It just doesn't exist. Even myself, I have two kids, their dad doesn't live at home with us. I'm divorced. They have four stepbrothers and sisters from two other moms. It's not traditional. We all wish we had that fairy tale thing in our heads. But when it doesn't come true for children they shouldn't have to think, Oh, I don't have the mom and the dad, the perfect three kids and a dog. There's something wrong with me.”

Most of us have grown up envisioning the perfect family in our future; the house, the 2.5 kids and a happy father with a June Cleaver mother. As I have grown older I have realized (and I’m guessing you may have too) that in reality the perfect family does not exist. Things happen, life takes its toll and we fall in love with partners who have children already or we end up in a divorce that was never in the plans. It seems in Hollywood the perfect family does not exist either. 

The fact is that traditional families no longer dominate the makeup of our country. While current statistics indicate that 69 percent of children live with two parents, the makeup of that family can vary between biological, step and adoptive parents.

Look around you and I can bet that you know at least one family who no longer fits the “perfect family” mold. Even though my current family dynamics indicate on paper that we fit the “perfect family” mold, I am married to my children’s father and we have three children; I know that even within our “perfect family” we are not perfect at all.

Some of the women in my life who I admire the most are those that can make it outside of the perfect family environment. I admire a best friend who keeps her daughter grounded at home and lives with working out the dynamics of sharing the child with the man she divorced. I admire the women who do it all alone and manage to raise children who are a great addition to our society.

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The fact is, the perfect family does exist but it isn’t about the number of children or the fact that parents are married, it comes when the parent makes the time for children, does her best to raise her kids and teaches her children that being different is okay.

Do you think the perfect family exists?

What do you think?

Jennifer Lopez on the Myth of the Perfect Family

Heather Montgomery is a freelance writer with a background in Elementary Education and an almost embarrassing need to read celebrity gossip. As a work-at-home mom to three children, she enjoys spending time with her family and friends. She was married in 2003 and currently resides in Florida. ... More

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3 comments

  1. In my mind a perfect family is not about being married with kids and white picket fence….a perfect family is one that is full of love, forgiveness, guidance, and acceptance no matter if they comes with two moms, two dads, divorced cooperative co-parents, or otherwise. No one person is PERFECT but a family can be perfect in a way even with their imperfections by doing their best and being open to doing what ever is best for the development of the children.

  2. KaelinRae says:

    I don’t really think that there is any "perfect" family. With all the different types that exist today, it wouldn’t really be fair to raise one up above all the others. I think that as long as you are doing your best for your child, and providing everything that you can, then you are doing ok 🙂

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