Why I Chose to Have My Tubes Tied

pregnant couple smiling
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First, my husband and I had to read some literature, fill out some forms (separately), and then meet with a hospital social worker. During our meeting, she made it a point to stress that I needed to understand that this would be a permanent situation. Tubals are very difficult to reverse, and the success rate for doing so is low. We assured her that we completely understood the permanence of the situation and that we were all good.

Then we had to listen to her spout off different scenarios that might cause us to wish that we hadn't decided on the tubal.

What if we changed our minds in a year? (We won't).

What if we get divorced and I want to have children with my new husband? (Uh honey … if we get divorced, no one is going to want to take on a lady with three kids under 3, so I will be in my 60s before I get re-married, and the tubal will be the least of my worries).

What if our children all perish in a horrible accident and Steve and I want to have more kids? What if the baby I am carrying doesn't survive delivery? (That's just mean, lady, and you are saying it to me when I am 7-months pregnant. You are lucky I don't curl up into a sobbing heap on the floor right now!)

Finally, what stopped the line of questioning is that Steve and I told her what was in our hearts. We knew we weren't done adding to our family right now, but after three kids by birth, we were certain that the way we wanted to grow our family further was through adoption. At this point, we weren't sure how soon we wanted to start this process, but we knew it was in our future. So if all our kids were tragically lost tomorrow, if the baby I was carrying didn't survive delivery, we already knew what we were going to do. 

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Comically, this line of questioning was all repeated again — right before I was wheeled into the delivery room for the c-section and tubal procedure! It just seems crazy to me that there was no counseling involved when I was pregnant and bringing new people into the world without necessarily having a clue about what I was doing, yet when I decided that I wanted to stop getting pregnant, there were all kinds of interventions needed to make sure that I knew exactly what I was signing up for!

Was It the Right Decision?

For us, absolutely! It was fantastic not having to worry about remembering to take an oral birth-control pill (I was a pretty busy mom, raising my three young boys!), and since there are no hormonal side effects to having a tubal, life just continues on as usual without the worries of a surprise pregnancy.

And we did indeed actually grow our family by three more amazing kids through adoption over the next several years. For us, things turned out exactly the way they were supposed to be. 

{ MORE: First Trimester Got You Down? Check Out These Experienced Moms' Tips to Help You Get Through }

Have you considered – or had – a tubal ligation? What has your experience been?  

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What do you think?

Why I Chose to Have My Tubes Tied

My name is Sharon and I am the busy Mom of six children ages 13, 12, 11, 10, 9, and 8. People often ask me "How do you do it?" I tell them that my key to success lies in planning ahead, with a whole lot of creativity and organization thrown in! ... More

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5 comments

  1. Holly says:

    I currently have 2 boys 14&11 yrs old . I decided I was going to have my tubes tide (hulka clips) I got the procedure done may 2015 . Well to my surprise I found out I was 12 weeks pregnant in August !!! I was shocked how did this happen I guess I was the 1% that could conceive I’m currently 35 weeks pregnant and decided to wait to find the gender out at birth why not make it. Bigger surprise .. After this baby my husband is getting an vasectomy and to be on the safe side I’m getting the cut and burn procedure this time

  2. jesster131 says:

    I guess it all depends on where you are. My son was born via C-section when I was 40. He is an only child. We had had some short discussions with my Dr about the possibility of doing a c-section but nothing had been formally decided. I had not been planning a c-section but some minor complications came up & it was decided at hour 18 of labor to do a C-section. As we were prepping for it my Dr looks at us & says I know we talked a little about it. So are you wanting me to do a tubal while we are at this or not. It was almost an oh by the way. My mind had already been made up that if we had to do the c-section I would have the tubal so my answer was yes but it would have sounded so off the cuff to most other people.

  3. verochka31 says:

    I would like to say that baby number 6 via c-section should complete our beautiful family. this article just got me thinking…..

  4. Beth says:

    I also have three kids (my daughter from my previous marriage, who is 9, and my two boys, age 2 and 4, from my current marriage). After having a good amount of complications during my second pregnancy, the dr suggested that we shouldn’t try to have another, being that every problem gets worse with each one. We tried to listen and didn’t intend on getting pregnant again and used protection as well as being on the pill, and when my middle son was 14 mo old, we found out our little surprise!!! So when it came time to think about the methods we were going to use “after baby”, I knew a tubal was a right decision, also because I had also had three c-sections and figured why not get it over with while they’re in there. 🙂 But the ironic twist, is that I opted for the tubal to keep me from having to worry about birth control for the rest of my life, yet after things went back to normal after baby #3 came, things were off. My periods weren’t as I remembered them, way more painful, and symptoms I never remembered having. After a long consult with my dr, she realized I have endometriosis, and to control the pain and symptoms that get worse during my period, that I should go on the pill to try and not have it for as long as possible. It sucks knowing that I went thru all the pain of the tubal, only to have to take pills again, but at least I have the extra back-up, just in case.

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