Baby Shower Blues: How to Deal When No One Wants to Throw You a Shower

Your third trimester of pregnancy can be hard. There are the swollen ankles, the sleepless nights, and the endless questions about when your baby is due. One thing that helps many women get through the last few months of pregnancy is looking forward to their baby shower. They might imagine the decorations, the games, and the company. Or spend hours poring over newborn clothes, nursery décor, or baby gear in order to craft the perfect registry. For some women though, there won’t be any games, there won’t be a registry, and there won’t be an afternoon filled with loved ones wishing their soon-to-be baby the best because they’re not having a baby shower at all.

If you are one of those women, you’re not alone and it’s totally normal to feel bummed out about missing this pregnancy rite of passage. If you’re feeling blue because you’re new in town, you don’t have family that can throw you a shower, or aren’t having a shower for other reasons, check out these tips to help you cheer up and move on!

shower
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Find another way to celebrate baby

A baby shower isn’t the only way to celebrate a little one. Instead of dwelling on the fact that you’re not having a shower, spend some time coming up with other ways to celebrate your little one's impending arrival. You might go out to dinner with your family, have a special brunch with your friends, or simply revel in your upcoming joy during one-on-one time with your friends.

Document other pregnancy milestones

While a baby shower can feel like a major missing pregnancy milestone, don’t let the fact that you’re missing out on that one lead you to miss out on all the other great milestones you could be enjoying. Take a monthly belly bump picture, journal how you feel the first time you feel kicks, and collect your doctor’s notes and pregnancy mementos in a scrapbook.

Gather baby gear somewhere else

If part of your disappointment about missing out on your baby shower is caused by stress that you won’t be able to purchase the baby gear you need on your own, take some time to look into other ways you can get what you need. Reach out to friends and family for hand-me-downs, hit up your local thrift stores, or ask around to find out what churches, food banks, or non-profits in your area provide gear to moms in need.

{ MORE: 5 Tips for Hosting a Memorable Baby Shower }

Ask for the support you need

If your disappointment is centered around not feeling loved and supported, reach out to those you love and tell them what you need. Even if you don’t end up with the baby shower you’ve always wanted, chances are your friends and family will step up to show just how much they love you and your baby-to-be.

Not having a baby shower is disappointing if you were hoping for one. Soon enough, though, you’ll have your baby in your arms and will realize that you already have the greatest gift you could hope for!

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Baby Shower Blues: How to Deal When No One Wants to Throw You a Shower

Julia Pelly has a master's degree in public health and works full time in the field of positive youth development. Julia loves hiking after work, swimming during the summer and taking long, cuddly afternoon naps with her two sons on the weekends. Julia lives in North Carolina, with her husband and two young boys. You can find more of her work at JuliaPelly.com ... More

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