4 Ways to Get Your Partner Involved In Your Pregnancy

Image via Flickr/Emery Co Photo
Image via Flickr/Emery Co Photo

I love being pregnant, and as I near the end of what is most likely my last pregnancy, I am trying to soak all of it in. I love feeling the baby move inside, I love the kicks, the twists, and yes, even the painful ones. I like watching my shape change and feeling wonderfully round and it helps that my husband loves the new curves as well. 

Having a supportive partner through pregnancy is important to me — I am not sure what pregnancy would be like if I didn't have my husband's love and support. He helps me see the positives when the hormones get me down or the worry creeps up. He embraces my changing shape with love and always makes me feel beautiful.

This whole experience can feel very one-sided with their involvement coming more in when the baby is born and out in the world, but it's possible to help your partner connect with your pregnancy and your baby beforehand as well. 

I wonder if our partners feel a connection to the baby like we do. I'm going to guess it's harder because they're not the one actively pregnant and feeling the baby move all the time, but there are some ways you can help your partner connect. 

Image via Flickr/Arkansas Shutterbug
Image via Flickr/Arkansas Shutterbug

1) Encourage your partner to go to each appointment: I know that all the prenatal appointments don't usually bring too much excitement, but usually after the weighing and checking blood pressure, you get to hear your baby's heartbeat. Encouraging your partner to attend all, or as many of the appointments as they can, is a simple way for you both to be connected to the health of the pregnancy and your baby. 

Image via Flickr/aprilandrandy
Image via Flickr/aprilandrandy

2) Don't leave them out of the baby purchases: While you may think your partner doesn't care what products you pick for baby, those decisions and taking the trips to buy them is one way your partner can be involved. Encourage your partner to go to the store and search out your favorite baby gear, clothes, and more — big and small items. 

Image via Flickr/Vivian Chen
Image via Flickr/Vivian Chen

3) Date often, talk a lot, and cuddle: Life gets so busy and while you both may think you've got a lot of time (9 months!) until your baby arrives, that time flies by faster than you thought possible. One way to help your partner stay connected and involved in your pregnancy is to spend time together. Go on weekly or bi-weekly dates, talk a lot about what you're experiencing, your goals, dreams, and fears and make time to cuddle. Encourage your partner to feel the baby move, kick, and wiggle. It's amazing how that hand on your belly can keep you both connected to all the changes. 

Image via Flickr/Aasen Ryan Famliy
Image via Flickr/Aasen Ryan Famliy

4) Put them in charge: Of something! My husband is in charge of getting the snacks to satisfy any cravings I have and/or getting rid of any food aversions I have. For me, food is a large part of my pregnancy, with many aversions and random cravings, and having my partner in charge of them is a fun way for him to stay connected. 

This ‘in charge' element could involve having them assemble baby gear, plan travel for relatives coming in to help after baby is born, or make the the game plan for your other children while you are recovering from delivery. During your pregnancy he can also take charge of taking weekly pictures, keeping track of the pregnancy calendar, or even packing the hospital bag necessities thanks to a checklist like this one from Pampers. It allows him to stay connected to the changes being experienced in pregnancy and it's a small, and sometimes entertaining, way to be involved. 

MORE: How To Get Your Man To Pamper You During Your Pregnancy}

Pregnancy should include your spouse and involve bonding time for the two of you. Once baby arrives, your whole world will look different. It's important to nurture your relationship, communicate about the future, and include one another in decision making. This whole experience can feel very one-sided with their involvement coming more in when the baby is born and out in the world, but it's possible to help your partner connect with your pregnancy and your baby beforehand as well. 

:: What are some of the ways you encourage your partner to get involved in your pregnancy? Share in the comments! ::

 

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4 Ways to Get Your Partner Involved In Your Pregnancy

Devan McGuinness is the founder of the online resource Unspoken Grief, which is dedicated to breaking the silence of perinatal grief for those directly and indirectly affected by miscarriage, stillbirth and neonatal death. Using her own experience of surviving 12 miscarriages, Devan has been actively supporting and encouraging others who are wading through the challenges associated with perinatal and neonatal loss. Winner of the 2012 Bloganthropy Award and named one of Babble's “25 bloggers wh ... More

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7 comments

  1. Thanks you for writing such a constructive article about helping a dad be involved during the pregnancy and more importantly bond with the baby. I was the primary caregiver/at-home dad for 20 years from 1991 to 2011. I struggled to bond with our babies during the pregnancy because of the very nature that my wife was carrying the baby. I really had to work at it. However, I had plenty of time to catch up after the birth. My boys are now 29, 28 and 24.

  2. Valiegurl says:

    I send my husband texts from the baby updating him on her progress. He loves them and really appreciates them because they help keep him connected to the pregnancy.

  3. Rosa says:

    I’m very lucky because my husband and I Ben married and trying to consive for 11 years thank God my little miracle is a board I’m 3 months and I have all the support of my husband but sometimes i think he forgets we are pregnant just because I’m always talking to my baby and rubbing my belly so the baby feels me and days pass and he won’t even touch my belly I have to keep reminding him about our baby 🙂 hopefully he stars bonding more. And all these suggestions are very helpfull. Thanks

  4. joyce says:

    with my husand’s job it’s hard for him to make it to my doctor’s appointments but I include him on every decision making process which helps both of us.

  5. starlytegurl says:

    I feel like men get the short end of the stick sometimes when it comes to pregnancy – I was sick (throwing up daily unless I took medications, and even then it didn’t always work) but feeling that little person move around inside my belly made every moment worth it! Men don’t get that same experience, but I know my son knew his Daddy while he was in my belly because he would kick like crazy when my husband talked to my belly!

  6. fallon says:

    This is very helpful, i feel like especially in the first trimester it’s hard to get my boyfriend on board with being involved

  7. Amber says:

    I love the tips of how to get my partner involved now the whole baby shopping, all he sees is his money going to something that he needs, but i have also talked to him about that we made this baby and we have to support this baby also, he’s been planned and now we are making time all next month to get baby clothes and such leave the big things for last, my husband also goes to every doc’s appt even if he loses a lot of sleep, he works 2nd shift so all appt’s are for the morning so 9am to see a doctor is worth it especially to hear our son’s heartbeat, but the 4 ways article is great.

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