When Your Husband Feels Neglected After Child Birth
Your hubby gazes across the room at you with that look in his eyes. You know, the look that demands attention, requests affection, and insists on a little, well, action.
You’re exhausted, and you just want to sleep. But if your spouse is feeling neglected and you don’t address it now, you’ll have bigger problems as the chaos of the first year subsides.
Pre-baby, those hooded eyes and pouting lips would have turned you on. Now, you want to respond by squirting breast milk in his eyes.
Jennifer Landa, M.D., and author of the book The Sex Drive Solution for Women: Dr. Jen’s Power Plan to Fire Up Your Libido, says many husbands feel neglected after the baby’s arrival. For a long time, he received all of your affection and attention at the end of a long day. Then your baby arrived and suddenly you don’t remember you have a husband until you accidentally trip over him on your rush to the crib for a midnight feeding.
If this sounds familiar, it’s time, says Landa, to spread the love around a little. “A lot of women lose sight of (their husbands),” at this time, she says. “Relationships suffer for it.”
Don’t get us wrong: we understand. New babies + no sleep does not = feelings of amore. Sleep deprivation has been used as a method for torture, after all, and new parents not only get too little shut eye, but they are then required to clean the house, fix dinner, pay the bills, and take care of a tiny human who relies on them for everything. You’re exhausted, and you just want to sleep. But if your spouse is feeling neglected and you don’t address it now, you’ll have bigger problems as the chaos of the first year subsides.