Women Share Mom Memories That Matter
Wednesday, May 7th, 2014
When I was little, my mom was my comfort.
When I was a teen, we didn’t understand each other.
When I was in college, I “knew” so much that I had to tell her.
When I was newly married, I was busy and didn’t talk quite as much, but not for the right reasons.
When I became a mother, I learned to talk less and listen more—to see her as a partner in loving my children and someone whose words (that I might not always agree with) come from a place of unique love.
These shifts in perspective are normal and create the roadmap of the mother-daughter relationship. It ebbs and flows and shifts like any other Heart Link does. But now that I’m a mom, I know that this unique love is palpable.
I asked four women to share a memory of their own mothers. And as expected, the moments they zoomed in and focused on differed from observations from their youth, to asking for help as a new mom, to watching their mothers shift into grandmothers. But the nostalgic part—the part they all wanted to hold onto—was the same. It was their mothers showing love.
When I became a mother, I looked at my mom with softer eyes—the same ones I hope my own children see me with. For all the memories we create for our children—and all the ones we mess up for them—it’s always showing love that stands strongest.
Four women share the memories of their own mothers that matter.
Maria Colaco is the chick-in-charge of the blog The New York Mom, a narrative about fashion, food, family, DIY, travel, and daily shenanigans. In her spare time, she kisses boo-boos and slays dragons.
About a memory with her mom, Maria says, “One of the most vivid memories I have of my mom is watching her carefully drape herself with beautiful silk saris and putting on her lipstick and ornate earrings. I used to sit in her bedroom and wear her clothes and put on her shoes and pretend to be just like this gorgeous role model of a woman [whom] I was blessed to call my mother. I wore a silk sari for my wedding, and my mom helped me drape it around my body. It was one of the most significant moments of my life.”
Melissa Chapman blogs about her marriage and everything in between at Married My Sugar Daddy.
About a memory with her mom, Melissa says, “After my son was born, I was a WRECK. I’d had major complications with my c-section and was emotionally and physically EXHAUSTED. My mother, in her true mama-bird fashion, literally moved into my hospital room and morphed into Aurora from ‘Terms of Endearment’ (much to the chagrin of the nursing staff). If I needed a shot, SHE DAMN well made sure I GOT THAT shot. In those moments when I was at my most vulnerable and confused, my mother wrapped me in a bubble of unconditional love and kept me from drowning.”
Kim Bongiorno is an author, essayist, humorist, freelance writer, and the woman behind the award-winning blog Let Me Start By Saying.
About a memory with her mom Kim, says, “It was the first time I let my kids come with me to my mom’s house after she was diagnosed with cancer. The entire four-hour drive up there, I reminded them we were going to cheer Grandma up and help her out, not wear her out. I was ready to take care of everything and everyone because I was The Mom now.
“Upon arrival, the three of them took over. They cooked me dinner together, with my kids standing on the same chairs I stood on in that kitchen thirty years ago with my mom before she wore labels like ‘senior citizen’ or ‘widow’ or ‘cancer patient.’
“The next day, my kids rode bikes and ran across the lawn with my mom slowly following along with a smile. It reminded me of where my strength came from, my ability to keep moving when life got hard. I stood in the shade of an apple tree, watching my mom be The Mom again, loving that she was the example my kids should see—an example that has carried for generations, pulsing through my veins and heart and the way I mother, keeping me in the picture even when I was the one taking it, keeping her in the picture even when the kids and I got back home.”
Andrea Mowery writes at About 100%, a blog about parenting and life sprinkled with hefty doses of self-deprecating humor, common-sense attitude, and heart.
About a memory with her mom, Andrea says, “Although we live 250 miles apart, my mom and I have always been close, talking daily on the phone. When I had my babies, over the phone, she helped me know when to feed and how to soothe. She was my baby hotline, and when I felt frazzled, she was there to offer words of wisdom and to bring me from panic to practical action. Those conversations mean so much to me, and they served not only to solidify our relationship of mother and daughter, but also as mothers together.”
What’s an important memory you have with your mom?Read More