How to Deal with a Mother-In-Law that Drives You Crazy
There are television shows and major motion pictures to deal with this very situation. The truth is that mother-in-laws are annoying enough once you get married – but add a baby to the mix and you just might be pushed over the edge. Still, if you give it time and follow a few simple strategies, you can make things at the very least tolerable. Who knows, after a few years, you might just learn to love her.
If you can be the bigger person and swallow more than you chew – you will at the very least put karma on your side.
First of all, understand the situation. Chances are you and your mother-in-law are strong willed. However, try to see things from her perspective. She loves your spouse and her grandchildren, and wants to be involved in their lives. The one thing keeping her from being the matriarch is YOU.
So, perhaps a little jealousy on her part is in order. While you shouldn’t simply excuse rudeness or being constantly belittled, you don’t have to engage in World War III over something that is obviously childish. If you can be the bigger person and swallow more than you chew – you will at the very least put karma on your side.
Another rule to dealing with your mother-in-law is to set boundaries in the beginning. Far too many people allow or appoint their mother-in-law to be in charge of the children all the time (as a full time babysitter), and then try to pull back those reins anytime they wish. You can’t have your cake and eat it too. If you want boundaries that keep your mother-in-law in her familial place, then you have to make concessions on your side as well. Set boundaries by being kind and respectful.
Don’t demand she stay away, but rather make it clear that you are now your own family – and that it needs to be respected. If she is stepping into your ground, make sure to hold your spot as well as you can, without crushing feelings or causing resentment.