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The Science of Tantrums
Monday, December 26, 2011 by Jeannie Fleming-Gifford
Tantrums. Hopefully you haven't seen too many of these in the past few days
.
Tantrums can be unpredictable. Sometimes, they seem to happen for no apparent reason. They often seem sparked by the unknown. Sometimes, they make absolutely no sense.
And, as to how to best resolve a tantrum? Most of us try to work through the minute - or more - of screams and tears while holding back our own screams and tears
.
When was the last tantrum your child experienced? Was there a rhyme or reason for the tantrum?
Unfortunately, tantrums are known as a "typical part of toddler development." Previously, science didn't pay too much attention to tantrums. Science simply noted that every tantrum - whether long or short - seemed to have two specific components: anger and sadness.
Thanks for the help, right?
Never fear, hot off the press is a new scientific study that was launched in order to gain some additional insight into tantrums. Specifically, this research study collected data from specialized onesies that toddlers wore, complete with built-in microphones, in order to capture the sounds of screams/yelling/whining. They then worked to quantify these sounds, attempting to make some sense out of them.
This study reported that: Tantrums turn out to have a pattern and rhythm to them. Once understood, researchers say, this pattern can help parents, teachers, and even hapless bystanders respond more effectively to temper tantrums — and help clinicians tell the difference between ordinary tantrums, which are a normal part of a child's development, and those that may be warning signals of an underlying disorder.
Researchers defined three specific parts to each tantrum - no matter how often they occur or how long they last.
What is this pattern and rhythm?
1. Yelling and screaming.
2. Physical actions. (Good news, once you get to this point, research notes you are getting to the end of a tantrum as lots of energy has been expended).
3. Crying/Whining/Fussing. (When you reach this stage, children are generally ready to seek comfort. The tantrum is coming to a close).
Of course, the better question: What can you do as a parent to more quickly diffuse a tantrum?
Though often easier said then done, the best thing you can do is remain calm. Sometimes, doing nothing is the best tactic. This is especially true during the stage of anger and screaming (when it is - of course - hardest for any parent to remain calm and do nothing).
Can't hold your tongue? Try giving your toddler short, specific demands:
1. Sit down.
2. Go to your room.
The goal is to help diffuse the anger and move your toddler through the stages of the tantrum; getting to the sadness stage as soon as possible, then having the ability to comfort them.
What do you think?
Does this study provide helpful insight to you when it comes to dealing with tantrums?
What works for your child? What doesn't?
Remember, when it comes to parenthood - the good and the "challenging" - we're all in it together.
