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My Kid Tells ME What to Do!
Monday, August 29, 2011 by Jeannie Fleming-Gifford
I couldn't wait for her to talk. From the moment she came out of the womb, I did everything and anything I could to support her language development. When she cooed, I melted. She babbled; I clapped. When she finally said "Da-Da," my heart nearly lept out of my chest (I think it actually did when she finally got around to saying "Ma-ma!").
What was your little one's first words? Are you there yet or are they well on their way?
Soon after those first few words, we quickly moved on to simple sentences. She was so adorable.
Today, words easily pour out of her mouth. Sometimes, she says the cutest things. I wish I could capture those moments and place them inside a snazzy glass jar which I could keep the lid on till the day I need to hear those words again. Then, I would release those moments again (yes, this IS what video cameras are for, but sometimes I'm just not quick enough).
Other days, I'm not so sure about this whole talking thing. This is especially true when her words aren't so sweet.
Oh, it's not so bad, but a bit comical how my little one seems to have found the power of her words.
"Up." Absolutely, I'll carry her anyday, anytime. I know it won't be long till she'll be running off on her own.
"Sit down." Oh sure, why not I think.
"Eat." Hmmm...I'm really not sure I need another bite, but it's so cute the way she hands me her food.
"Play." Is that an invitation? Sure!
And from there it has become more complicated, sometimes a bit more bossy. I tend to draw the line when the kiddo's words start being about HOW I should do something or WHEN I should do it. "Put purple cup there." "Pick up toothbrush." "Go over there."
Really? When did cuteness turn into bossiness? Have you experienced this?
As our munchkins grow through toddlerhood and preschool years, they also grow more and more independent.
This is all good, right? After all, they are asserting their own autonomy.
Where do you find balance in supporting this bossiness (um, I mean "independence") vs. also teaching them respect, kindness, and appropriateness?
Before I jump right in and tell my kiddo what to do, I try to go back to the basics:
*Model appropriate behavior. I HATE being told what to do. Show me; better yet, do it with me. "I'll go get my toothbrush, and you take care of yours."
*Help create the RIGHT words. "Will you help me? Can you please pick up my toothbrush?"
*Partner to get the job done. "I'll tell you what; I'll get the toothbrush, if you get your cup."
Bossiness is all part of growing up. It CAN be a good thing. At least this is what I keep telling myself.
What about you?
