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Long Hair, Mom Hair
Yea, so by now you likely know that I have teenagers. And it’s amazing how they have gone from thinking I am the coolest, most beautiful mom in the world to worrying about how I look? (God forbid I embarrass THEM, despite the fact that THEY are the ones who gave me this belly roll).
So, the other day, as we passed several other moms around my age – all of whom had taken the plunge straight into what my kids call "mom hair," (short, layered, needs to be rolled daily) one of my daughters blurted out in desperation, “Mom, please don’t EVER CUT YOUR hair like that!”
Luckily, they don’t remember the episodes of hair schizophrenia that I have had over the years, yikes! (And I have pretty much destroyed any pictures!)
Every time I have had a child, I ended up sitting in the hair salon asking for something easier, prettier, curlier, darker, lighter, or somehow better than the long hair I have had for years. And after being butchered, by my own choosing – I spent years growing my hair right back to the place that it used to be. Long, straight. BORING! But me, nonetheless. (Not that I am boring.)
Recently, a friend of mine did the "mom hair" thing, cutting at least a foot of gorgeous hair off, and I was horrified. More recently, however, she has rectified (thank goodness) the situation by getting it cut into an incredibly sexy, pixie cut that looks amazing on her. (Just when I thought she couldn’t get any more gorgeous…kudos Kate!) And, I know LOTS AND LOTS of short-haired mamas who flaunt short locks and look amazing. So why, oh why, can’t I?
The funny thing is that many women (with long hair) have a major addiction when it comes to their hair. While I have known a few that were all over the place with haircuts and style, most I know cling desperately to their younger days by hanging on to the hair that accompanied them. I have seen women who have gone through childbirth without drugs wincing at the thought of getting their split ends cut off – hands clenched on the chair. No wonder our husbands don’t notice our haircuts!
And even while many of us go a little shorter every year, it is that slow funeral procession pace toward the despicable "mom hair," that is in our future.
Maybe we should all just go ahead and model our favorite 80-year-old woman who gets her hair done at the salon once a week, and, in the famous words of Nike, just do it! I mean, aren’t we just putting off the inevitable?
So I ask you, does our hair REALLY define us? Why such a big adieu over nothing? What is so wrong with me (and many others) that makes getting a REAL haircut so frightening? (Aside from the fact that it won’t go up in a ponytail, it certainly isn’t painful.)
Truth be told, this is a real issue for many moms, and there is a definite attachment to our hair that seemingly goes further than just our looks. So, please chime in with your thoughts.
Did you have hair schizophrenia after having children? Have you taken the plunge into "mom hair?"
P.S. The good news (for me at least) is that I can now hang on to my young hair a little longer based on the premise that my kids would be horrified to be seen with me otherwise. And yes, I am doing the “neener, neener, neener” dance! What's your excuse?
Stef Daniel is the 40ish year old, experienced (meaning crazy already) mother of count ‘em…4 daughters (yes, she takes prayers) who have taught her nearly E.V.E.R.Y.T.H.I.N.G she needs to know about raising kids and staying sane. She hails from ...Read More