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I Slipped
Thursday, January 19, 2012 by Jeannie Fleming-Gifford
It's true. Children learn what they live. You can learn a lot about the environment your child is in by simply listening to and watching them.
What are they saying? What are they doing? Where did these behaviors come from?
I was reminded of this the other day. I had that “oops” moment where I slipped. Well, I cussed to be more exact. I can’t even remember which word it was. I just remember it was “bad.”
Oops.
Have you ever slipped in front of your child? What did you do? What happened?
As for me, as soon as I swore, I looked around. I was startled. I was stunned. I was shocked. I hadn’t done that before, well, at least since the kiddo was old enough to have the skills to repeat what they had just heard.
As I looked around with that “huh?” “what just happened?, “ I realized I was safe this time around. In other words, it looked like the kiddo was in her own little world of play and hadn’t heard my oops. And, so far, I haven’t heard from her preschool teachers, the hubby or my mother-in-law that she may have picked up on my little slip.
With the above admitted, I’ve seen some other behaviors that my kiddo has seemed to acquire. My child has been in group care since she was a toddler and though I’ll happily admit there are many positives from that experience, I’m also the first to admit she’s acquired a few behaviors I wish wouldn’t have made their way home with her. There are your typical bodily noises at the dinner table that the kiddo finds rather amusing. There is also her newest expression that goes something like, “well, if you don’t do XYZ, then I’m not going to be your best friend anymore.”
Oy.
When it comes to the developing child, sometimes I miss those early days of infancy. Though physically exhausting, the beauty of an infant, the simplicity of their smiles and coos, and even their cries - sometimes, it seems those were the simpler days.
Don’t get me wrong. Raising a toddler or preschooler isn’t rocket science.
Wait. Some times,it is.
What happens when your child displays inappropriate behaviors? What happens whey they use words you’d rather not hear?
Here's my ammo:
*Ignoring undesirable behaviors whenever possible. Most of the time, if they do not get attention, they go away.
*Re-directing/re-engaging the munchkin in something else. Toys, food, books.
*Being a good role model. (Except for my occassional "oops.")
*Being clear about the expectations - "That is not appropriate" - and finding appropriate leverage if needed (i.e. missing out on watching a show or getting stories read before bed rank high on the kiddo's list around here).
*Keeping consistent. Let's face it, parenthood can be exhausting. Even we we are tired, we have to work to help our children be the best they can be and encourage good choices.
I'm working on living the way I'd like my child to learn.
How about you? What is your child learning from you and their environment these days?
